I think I get where you are coming from I would just say, try not to worry so much about the future/having all of the right answers, if at all possible. As long as you are both happy and healing from this very

recent traumatic experience, that's what matters. You don't need all of the extra pressure to be spiritually correct, just my two cents. I know it's natural to question what our feelings and beliefs are with life and death and all of it during this time. Loss is always horrible when it comes, unfortunately, I didn't learn that until my dad died. We can't pregame it. It's part of life, we can't let go before the final act comes, not truly. Maybe the person going through it can, but those we leave behind will always mourn, it's unavoidable. I think it's natural to think about death at the end of treatment. But try not to overthink it, you have so much else to live for. You are coming out of a dark place, and there is a deceptive comfort in that in a weird way. I know it kind of reinforced my knowledge that what I went through was real, when so much around me negated it, to have these deep dark thoughts. But it can lead to depression, why I am pushing back a bit here. You deserve to be happy and live your life now. Not to forget what you have been through, but to live with the knowledge of it and expand your life from here. 💗