I’m The Black Sheep Brother in This TV Show, and I’m Here to Cause Total Havoc
When things get a little too cozy in your favorite drama, the writers know just who to call
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Hey girl, I’m Jake. I’m new in town. I’m your favorite nice guy Brian’s older brother. I know, I am crazy good-looking, it’s hard to believe we came from the same parents!
Actually, we have different Dads - my Dad had the rock star hair and attitude that I came out of the womb sporting. Brian was always a nerd, poor sucker. Love my bro though, he would do anything for me.
I can’t help it if being a cool guy who likes to live dangerously sometimes gets me in trouble. I’m a renaissance man at heart, I play guitar!
Sure, I just got out of jail for armed robbery, but have you seen my tattoos? Oh, this six-pack? Comes with a life of casual crime, babe (wink).
I think you and I, sweet girl who my brother loves/viewer at home (I see you too girl, we all know you were just waiting for a fun guy like me to liven up this snoozefest am I right? Don’t forget to check my IMDB page. I got Hallmark Movies you wouldn’t believe!) ….now where was I.
Oh yeah — you and me, girl, we should take a ride on my motorcycle to the beach.
I could show you a fun time, not like my stick in the mud brother. Hop on, hold on tight!
What’s that you say? I drove too fast and scared the life out of you? Aw, you secretly loved it! I could feel your heart beating as you clung on tight.
This is the beach where my best friend died in a shootout/police bust/mystery drowning. I loved him like a brother, he was much cooler than my actual brother. Excuse me a minute I get emotional about it — yes, that is a tear rolling down my cheek.
I have feelings too, underneath this tough guy exterior. Does that make you forget all about my brother who supports your every wacky dream and want to kiss me instead? Cool!
So we’re in love now, it’s time for me to confess something to you, my sweet girl.
I am in a little trouble, it turns out drug dealers hold grudges and I owe a bad guy $30,000. I am trying to stay on the…